And Then?

You might have heard this already, but I got engaged last week! [insert wild applause!] It’s officially no longer silly or embarrassing to ponder how my first name fits with his last name. (Yes, we still do that in our thirties and no, I won’t admit for how long I pondered it prior to the proposal.)

For the first few nights after he popped the question, I lost my ability to sleep through the night [insert joke about practicing for eventual parenthood!]. My SMOG mind kept adding to the list of decisions to make and things to accomplish. All I wanted was to happily look at my engagement ring one more time and then blissfully fall back to sleep, but my brain just responded,

“And then…?”

If there had been a Chinese food drive through ordering device within reach, I probably would have called it names and punched it.

These “and thens” are distractions designed to overwhelm. If I choose to give in to them, they’ll steal portions of my joy for as long as I allow. I much prefer the ones that appear as I’m brushing my teeth…and realize that I’m gonna be an aunt to four lovely little girls. [insert sentimental sigh!] These “and thens” are gifts; all sorts of awesome add-ons that come with this new season of life. They pop up as I listen to my married friends share stories of their experiences, smiling at the memories made with the someone they love so dearly. They appear when I take time to be quiet and consider all God so generously and miraculously placed in my life. Those are the “and thens” that give me a better sense of the richness I walk in and the intentionality I need to operate with every day…every season.

Life is always peppered with the busy and the beautiful. The busy has its place; but it should never overwhelm the beautiful. I pray in this season and in all the seasons to come, that God will help me invest my attention wisely, to count my blessings rather than my tasks, and to take joy in the journey.

It wasn’t quite this way, but I do wish I owned this red sparkle dress. (art by Makana)

And now, check out what my husband-to-be has to say post-proposal. [insert more wild applause!] I promise, I started this post before reading his…


2 thoughts on “And Then?

  1. Oooh. This is good – “count my blessings rather than my tasks.” I can relate to this because I am always always trying to figure out what the next task is that needs to be completed. I want to learn to be present and just soak in the moments.

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